


Locked Away

by coffeeflavoredtears



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Abuse, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - 1920s, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Asylum, Beating, Blood and Gore, Character Death, Eventual Smut, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Heavy Angst, Homophobia, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Mental Health Issues, Mental Instability, Minor Character Death, Multi, Near Death, Period-Typical Homophobia, Physical Abuse, Schizophrenia, Smut, Trans John Laurens, Trans Male Character
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-17
Updated: 2019-10-28
Packaged: 2020-10-20 19:09:18
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,272
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20680454
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coffeeflavoredtears/pseuds/coffeeflavoredtears
Summary: 1920's Asylum Au!"Hey. I'm Alexander.""I... Jo-" He was cut off by the guard shoving him roughly. A reminder. "Jane." They said, looking down uncomfortably."Nice to meet you." Alexander said softly, offering his hand....People don't understand what it's like to truly live in a world where nobody will accept you for who you are, except of course those who are in the same position as you. Alexander and John find each other among the troubles of their new lives, trying to convince their 'psychiatrist' to keep quiet about their actions and teach him the truth of them.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ImmigrantPhenomenon](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ImmigrantPhenomenon/gifts).

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Alexander could still remember in great detail the day they had been caught. It had been like any other day. He had gotten off of work, changed quickly into women's clothing, and gone to his neighbor, Lafayette's house. They had both assumed it looked less suspicious if he was arriving dressed as a woman. But unfortunately for them, as Alexander was leaving, Lafayette kissing him goodbye, the hat that hid his face fell off, revealing him to the people walking the streets.

His goatee was on full display, several of them rushing to get the police. Instead of being charged as criminals, the pair had been shipped off to separate 'hospitals' to get help. Alexander had known exactly what they meant by that. He knew they were going to try to "fix" the gay, as if it was some sort of disease. 

Baseline of it was, he was genuinely fucked. Not only did he know he would never see his lover again, but he knew as a result of it they would both be subjected to things unthinkable. And Alexander blamed himself for it. He had been the one to suggest regular meetups, to suggest meeting in private to continue something they had both known would only end in what had occurred. 

The train to the facility had been painstaking, along with the long bus ride to the actual asylum. The entire way his wrists had been tied and his mouth gagged, after he’d argued with them and shouted at them that they were vile people. He knew they didn’t care what happened to him. The entire time he was never given a chance to change out of the dress he had been wearing, only resulting in taunting from the men assigned to drag him to his new location.

Upon arrival he was stripped of everything and hosed off, nobody sparing a single thought to his comfort or anything, forcing him into nothing but a thin gown before being dragged off to be examined by a doctor. The process was Long and uncomfortable for Alexander, and each time he would try to argue with them it would only result in being hit by one of the men overseeing the physical evaluation, and once even a sharp slap across the face. He knew he didn’t belong there. He was a lawyer! He wasn’t the kind of person to end up in some sort of asylum, except to advise someone on legal practices. When he’d voiced it to them, they hadn’t cared a single bit, only reminding him he was there because he was sick and had been caught doing something that was unnatural.

_ Bulshit.  _ He thought with a sigh. He knew he was smart and he knew while it wasn’t legal there was nothing wrong with him psychologically. After all the physical examinations had been done, several in which they had to hold Alexander down for as he refused to let himself be treated as such without him fighting back. He didn’t stop fighting when things got tough back in his home country and he sure as hell wasn’t going to start now.

When it came time for the psychological ‘evaluation’ he had been dressed in simple clothing. There were no strings or stray strings that could be used to pull out. He rolled his eyes at it, disliking the boring pale blue and grey clothing. He was given a pair of shoes and led off to another area, being cuffed again to keep him from fighting back like he had done prior.He thought about Lafayette as he walked, thinking about what he was doing and what was going on with him, worried he was being given similar or even worse treatment. He could only hope Lafayette status and importance in his home country would simply get him sent there to be cared for by his family, and it gave him some peace knowing that he could be much safer soon enough.

One of the men that had been leading him around knocked on a door, someone calling for him to come in moments after. Sitting in a seat behind his desk was someone who simply looked the definition of pretentious. By the look of him Alexander knew the man simply  _ ha _ d to come from wealth, knowing there was no other way he could be so put together when faced with Alexander's sharp glare. He wasn’t going to put up with it. Alex was forced into a seat, one of the men quietly explaining who he was, and the reason he had been sent there.

The pretentious looking man only nodded, dismissing them with a wave of a hand. As soon as they were gone Alexander began his tirade on him, hoping he could annoy his way out, or prove he was perfectly sane to return to his normal life, working as a quite well known lawyer in his city. 

“Why am I here? Why did they take me here? There’s nothing wrong with me and I have plenty of clients who are relying on me to finish their cases. When am I going to be able to get back to my work? What-” Alexander’s rambling was cut off by a sharp slap. It wasn’t that he had never been hit before, or that he hadn’t been hit on the way there. It was the suddenness of it that surprised Alexander. 

“Quiet.” The man told him gruffly, clearly unphased by what had happened. “You need to listen and if you can’t get it through your mind that you are no longer in control we will not hesitate to force silence upon you. You know very well why you’re here right now, and as for your cases they are being transferred to different lawyers. As of now you have been stripped of your degree in law and criminal justice. You know as well as anyone that your relations with Lafayette are illegal and wrong, and when you can prove to everyone that you understand that simple fact, you will be released under strict supervision.

As of now, however, you have no rights, no leverage, and frankly no reason to act as you already have. Learn your place before you get yourself into real trouble.” The man kept his gaze sharp on Alexander, who was glaring at him. It was ridiculous. The prospect of losing his degree and job was disgusting to him, after all the work he had put in to receive them in the first place. “As I said, keep up this attitude and it will get you nowhere. As of right now you will be in a room on your own, though I’ve already been informed your future roommate will be arriving soon. From what I heard she’s also got some issues accepting reality.” He grumbled. ALexander was a bit confused by what he meant by the statement, but he could see continuing to argue the point wasn’t going to get him very far. If he wanted to leave and get back home he knew he would have to play along, so as the man called for the guards to bring him to his room, he got up and followed without complaint, though he was thinking of a million insults he wanted to throw at them for what they were doing.

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	2. Chapter 2

They were sitting at dinner when it happened. He hadn’t been thinking about it when he had snapped, but when his father spoke, his declaration angere him beyond belief.

“Oh, and Jane. I have been discussing with both your mother and this young man and we have decided you will be marrying him. Hopefully having a proper husband you’ll finally learn something.” He had been calm as he spoke, his mother nodding along, but he snapped at the mention of being married to some random guy who wouldn’t care.

“No!” He shouted, shooting up from his seat. “No!” He glared at his parents. “I never agreed to this.” He snapped, causing his father to stand. “And stop calling me by that name!”

“Enough!” His father shouted. “I’ve told you what would happen if you tried pulling that bullshit. You’re done for.” He glared, John’s mother standing up to try and calm her husband. 

“Dear why don’t we just take a moment to breathe…” She tried to reason. “It must be a lot to process at once.”    
“No. I’ve told her what would happen if she tried to pull that trick again. I’ll go make the call. And you.” He turned back to John. “Go to your room. I’d suggest you listen or I’ll find the worst place I can for you.” Knowing he had lost and if he cared for his life, he silently walked off, shooting his father one last glare.

The next morning he was brought to the asylum, being sent off without so much as a goodbye from his parents.

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When John first arrived he had expected the worst, and he was right to expect such. Similarly to Alexander he was stripped and hosed off, dressed in a thin gown and dragged off. He didn’t bother to argue or fight it, unsure of what would happen to him if he did. The woman who brought him to the psychologist as he was told was somewhat gentle, and John figured it was because he hadn’t fought them on anything but undressing in front of her, which she seemed to chalk up to his ‘disease’. 

As he walked into the room and sat down in the seat gestured, he quickly noticed the man sitting on the opposite side of the sturdy desk, files piled on top. He was sitting in front of a fairly thin one, which John assumed to be his as the man looked up to him. “Jane Laurens, correct?” He questioned, John giving a small nod. He wanted to speak up about it, but he already wanted to go home. Even if he had to wear the dresses he was already terrified, scared something would happen to him.

Even if his father had ‘smacked some sense into him' growing up, he’d heard of the inhumane ways they treated patients at places like these. He didn't want to be hurt like he believed he would be.

"Alright. Good to know you're not as much of a fighter as your roommate. You now have no right, not like you had many to begin with. To be released back to your family or your fiance, yes I've been informed of that situation, you will need to be able to prove your thinking has been fixed. You will be punished for attempting to make others call you by that guy's name you're so keen on. Once you get it through your head though that you are in fact a girl, you can go. Who knows, maybe having a male as your roommate will get you back to how you should be." The man spoke condescendingly to John, as if he was some mud at the bottom of his shoe. "There will be a change of clothing on your bed. You may go to your room now." He told John, who got up without another word or nod, walking outside the door. The same woman who had brought him there waited outside, stepping to be next to him. "Let's go." She told him, starting to lead him to the room. 

On the walk over, John's head remained down, only looking up when they stopped at a door, the woman opening it. "This is the ward you have been placed on." She explained, leading John to one of the rooms, the door wide open and empty of anyone else. "Your roommate is most likely in the common room. I'll go fetch him while you change. The door is to remain open during the days, though I will allow you to close it to change." She continued, John giving another nod as he went into the room, shutting the door for privacy and cringing at the dress on the bed be assumed was his. There was a box of things as well on the bed, along with some extra pillows and blankets be recognized from his bed at home, assuming his family had sent them with him. It was a small comfort. He changed into the dress and opened the door back up before sitting down and looking through the box, which had several personal items inside, including a few books he enjoyed, along with a stuffed animal he'd gotten as a child and some other random things he figured had been tossed in there as an attempt to give him something to entertain himself in a 'feminine way'. 

But it was nice to know he had some things from home. As he was placing everything back inside the box his roommate came on, and he looked up. His roommate seemed like a relaxed person, but he still had no idea of anything about him. The woman who had led him there was nowhere to be found, and as he did, he noticed how bare the other side of the room looked, only a few law books littering the side table. 

The other walked up to him and held out his hand. "Alexander Hamilton." He greeted, John looking up to him and shaking his hand. 

"John- I mean… Jane Laurens." He greeted, pulling his hand away and looking down, simply wanting to leave. He tensed up a bit expecting Alexander to make fun of him, but relaxed and looked up when he did speak. 

"John Laurens is a nice name." Alexander smiled. 


End file.
